How Families Can Cope with a Childhood Cancer Diagnosis

Every day in Canada, six children are diagnosed with cancer, according to the 2023 Annual Report from Childhood Cancer Canada. A paediatric cancer diagnosis doesn’t just affect the child with cancer; it can have a negative psychological and emotional impact on the entire family. A cancer diagnosis is one of the greatest challenges a family can face, but there are coping mechanisms and resources for families of sick children that can help foster resilience.

Coping Mechanisms

Coping, as defined by John Hopkins Medicine, is: “the efforts we make to manage situations we have appraised as potentially harmful or stressful.” The National Institutes of Health outlines four main types of coping strategies: problem-focused, emotion-focused, meaning-focused, and social coping.

Problem-Focused Coping Vs. Emotion-Focused Coping

Problem-focused coping strategies aim at solving or controlling the source of stress. While often seen as the most effective approach, it can fall short in situations where the stressor is simply beyond anyone’s control. For families facing a childhood cancer diagnosis, there is no quick fix or clear solution. In these moments, a different kind of coping becomes essential.

Emotion-focused coping helps individuals manage their emotional reactions to a situation they cannot change. Instead of solving the problem, it focuses on processing feelings. For families facing a childhood cancer diagnosis, this might mean reframing thoughts, naming difficult emotions, leaning into mindfulness, or finding small moments of joy. These strategies do not remove the hardship, but they offer a way to cope, stay connected, and build resilience in the face of the unknown.

Shift the Inner Voice

When facing childhood cancer, families can shape their journey by noticing and gently reframing harsh inner voices. Remind each other that while this is hard, you’re doing your best.

For the sick child: Use supportive language and playful affirmations to build courage and confidence (“I’m strong like a dinosaur!”)

For siblings: Reinforce resilience by naming their strengths (“You were so patient when plans changed.”)

For parents/caregivers: Replace self-blame with self-compassion (“This isn’t my fault.”)

For the whole family: Model hopeful language (“We’ll get through this together.”)

Over time, these shifts can support families’ mental health as they navigate the stress and uncertainty of childhood illness.

Create Space for Emotions

Emotion-focused coping means allowing hard feelings to surface, without judgment. There is no “right” way to feel when facing paediatric cancer.

For the sick child: Encourage drawing to express feelings they might not have words for.

For siblings: Create a quiet routine for one-on-one check-ins during walks or bedtime.

For parents/caregivers: Keep a journal or voice memo to release thoughts and emotions.

For the whole family: Name emotions out loud during car rides or meals (“I’m feeling worried today. How about you?”) to normalize emotional expression.

These small actions normalize the emotional effects cancer has on family members and can help kids and adults feel safe expressing what’s inside. To learn further how to support siblings of a child with cancer read our article The Invisible Sibling: Wishes Matter for the Whole Family.

Faith, Spirituality or Mindfulness

Grounding practices can bring calm and routine when everything feels unpredictable.

For the sick child: Hold onto comforting symbols like a favorite stuffy or keepsake.

For siblings: Listen to calming music or nature sounds before bed.

For parents/caregivers: If you practice, set aside time for reflection, prayer, or spiritual texts.

For the whole family: Take mindful walks outside, create shared rituals like a hope jar, practice short meditations or breathing exercises, and express daily gratitude together.

Whether faith-based or reflective, these grounding practices provide vital support for families of children facing illness. They create moments to pause, reconnect, and build strength together amid uncertainty.

Joy and Connection

Joy is more than just an emotion—it’s fuel. Especially during treatment, rituals of connection can help families reclaim moments of normalcy and hope.

For the sick child: Decorate IV poles with stickers or themed artwork.

For siblings: Keep small adventures alive, visit the library, or bake together.

For parents/caregivers: When possible, schedule date nights or self-care moments to recharge. Remember, taking time for yourself is not selfish, it helps you stay strong for your family during this journey.

For the whole family: Mark milestones with mini celebrations that everyone can share in.

Joy and connection are essential coping mechanisms that help families reclaim moments of hope. Make-A-Wish® Canada brings these moments to life by granting wishes that create lasting memories and strengthen family bonds. These experiences offer an emotional boost—reminding families they’re not alone and helping them build resilience through their medical journey. Your support makes these moments possible, giving families the strength and joy they need to keep moving forward. To hear more about the power of a wish from a mother’s perspective read our post Finding Light: A Parent’s Story of Childhood Cancer.